The Real Revolution

The good old (and definitely wise) Terry Pratchett told (in one of his Discworld novels), "But here's some advice, boy. Don't put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That's why they're called revolutions.". 

A few days back, I was discussing with a friend the state of affairs in China and how (as per him) the Chinese people are fed up with the current form of communism there. He has a great faith that the people will rise and will change the regime. I could not comprehend that. How can the mighty communist party of China fall? We discussed the revolutions in South Africa, India, and the current (ongoing) one in Burma. We also discussed the Arab spring. people rise up. There are violent or non-violent protests. People die. In some rare circumstances, regimes change. We have seen this in Egypt and Ukraine. However, in both these places, only the heads of the state changed. Nothing else changed. 

Bigger changes happened in history when the UK gave up its colonies. Besides all other factors, it was, by a large margin, due to the change of popular opinion in the UK. PM Attlee coming to power after WW II was, in a big way, responsible for India getting independence. And Attlee came to power because of the change in the perception of the common British people. Something similar happened in the Vietnam war. The common Americans wanted the war to end. They were disgusted by the amount of death and cruelty happening in the war. 

So, be it through violence or non-violence, change in the perception of the oppressor is needed for the success of a revolution. 

But what does one do when the oppressor is one's own, like in China or Burma? (PS: It can be noted that I am not trying to put China and Burma in the same box. They, rather, show two extremes. On one hand, we have a fairly small country's military and on the other hand, we have this juggernaut that does what it likes!)

I think, especially in these cases, there is a greater need for nonviolent protest. How long can the common soldiers follow the orders of the Tatmadaw bosses? How long can he keep killing his own friends? At one point, I am sure, the common soldier will reject the high commands. 

What happens after this? Unless society is ready and rich to produce leaders with empathy and compassion, not much will change in the long run. How do we change the world? How do we change our society? Charity does begin at home. We have to start with ourselves. To start, we have to understand ourselves. To understand (as if in a lab) we need to be mindful. In Krishnamurti's words..."To transform the world, we must begin with ourselves; and what is important in beginning with ourselves is the intention. The intention must be to understand ourselves and not to leave it to others to transform themselves or to bring about a modified change through revolution, either of the left or of the right. It is important to understand that this is our responsibility, yours and mine..."

Work without attachment

 There is a nice and often quoted sloka in Bhagwat Gita. 

Karmanye vadhikaraste Ma Phaleshu Kadachana । Ma Karmaphalaheturbhurma Te Sangostvakarmani ।।

This means that we have the right to our actions but not to the fruits they bear. Hence, keep working without thinking about the results. This is the most unpractical advice I have ever heard in my life. It makes no sense,......till recently. 

During the lockdown in 2020, my father would explain Bhagwat Gita to me over Zoom. During that one of the slokas we discussed was the 5th sloka from chapter 18. 

yajña-dāna-tapaḥ-karma na tyājyaṁ kāryam eva tat | yajño dānaṁ tapaśh chaiva pāvanāni manīṣhiṇām ||

It says that one can give up all actions besides three types of actions, viz. yajna, daana and tapah. There are various interpretations of this. My father pointed me to the interpretation given by Indian saint-reformist Vinoba Bhave in his Talks on the Gita (which is a compilation of his talks in a jail explaining Bhagwat Gita to his fellow inmates). 

He points out, very logically, that we are all born with three debts. 

First of all, the earth and the environment contributes to our growth. We are indebted to it. Secondly, our parents, families and society also contribute to our growth. Thirdly, our own body. We are all alive. This means numerous processes and organs are working seamlessly in our body. 

We have not done anything to pay back these loans. Any work we do to pay back the debt from nature and the environment is called yajna. Yajna is not just seating in front of a fire and chanting mantras. That is just one way about it. That is actually done to please all the Gods. And Hindu Gods represent forces of nature. So better yajna would be to serve nature directly. Plant trees, use less/no plastic, do not use products with a known track record of butchering the environment etc.; all these are acts of yajna.

Similarly, anything we do to pay back the debt from society is daana.  E.g. volunteering to teach kids from a disadvantaged background, donating to societal work, even something as simple as doing your job to the best of your ability; all these contribute to society. 

Lastly, anything we do to take good care of our body is tapah. E.g. doing regular exercise and meditation, taking a jog, eating healthy, eating less, doing intermittent fasting etc. 

A beautiful conclusion emerges when we combine the two things we discussed above. If you are doing anything to pay back a debt, do you expect results from it? It is debt anyway, something you owe! How can you expect any fruits from those actions? The moment you are mindful of the fact that a certain action you are doing falls into one of the three categories, viz. yajna, daana and tapah then automatically you lose interest in the results. 

Let us try to be grateful for all the debts we have got from nature, society and our own body. Being mindful of this will help us to forget about the results of our actions. And it will also make our actions better. 

Humans and animals

A few days back I had a small argument with a complete stranger on Instagram! The gentleman wanted to claim that homosexuality is unnatural. Someone pointed out that it is found in 450 species in nature. Then the person argued that comparison with animals is illogical because we humans are better. That is when I pointed out that there is actually no difference between humans and animals. In fact, for most parts, animals are way more well behaved than humans. To that, the person replied that dogs sniff butts before choosing partners and I should do the same if I believe humans are the same as animals. 

That made me think. Scientifically speaking there are hundreds of research which suggest the power of olfactory cues which we humans use subconsciously in our day to day dealings. Them why don't we sniff our dates? Because we are shamed. Because we have construed social norms which tell us doing so is not "nice". And, we all want to be "nice". We have our "ego" which stems from the I-factor or identity. I shall not go into the musings around the reason behind the emergence of this I-factor. Oriental philosophers have done an extremely thorough analysis of this. 

Let us start from the fact that we have this I-factor or identity. This sense of self is very unique to humans. A few other animals may have a basic sense of identity. This can be treated as a separate sense-organ. Again, this is not my invention. After a little bit of Googling I found that the Buddhists have always treated mind as a sense organ. And every sense organ needs sense-objects. Just as we have an internal drive to eat nice food, look at a nice sunset or smell the roses similarly we have a need to satisfy our "ego". 

It is very clear now. At a functional level, we are exactly the same as animals. We just have one more sense-organ to satisfy, the "I-factor" or "ego". Does that make us superior to other animals? Well, if you believe that a man with eyes is superior to a man without then yes. However, no sane person will even remotely consider a blind person inferior. In fact, all the other senses of a blind person are much sharper. In the same manner, animals are not inferior to us. In fact, due to the lack of the extra sense-organ ("ego") their other organs are mostly much sharper than that of humans. 

I sincerely thank my Instagram-stranger for making me see this so vividly. 

Can we have less numbers and more stories, please?

The countries with more poverty and/or more inequality are facing a tough time in controlling the current Covid19 pandemic. Anyone living in the countries having an extremely high number of infected patients can confirm that people are less careful now than they were a few months back. Why is it like that? Of course, an obvious reason is that people are fed up with the long lockdown periods. We shall briefly discuss another possible reason, viz. statistics!

Because of my background and profession, I am a strong believer in numbers and statistics. We engineers can achieve amazing things by putting our trust in numbers. So much so that I would dare call myself a follower of dataism (https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/npqu.12080)! I can trust my data. I can calculate the uncertainty of a circuit if I know the uncertainties of individual components. Then we can give an estimate of the number of years after which one would definitely need to consider replacing that circuit.  (I.e. I take numbers as input and give numbers as output!)

But, let us say you tell me that the fatality rate from road accidents in Cape Town is 47 per day and that in Delhi is 5. And then you ask me how more careful should I be on the roads of Cape Town? I do not think I have an answer. Or if you ask me what more should I do in Cape Town roads to be more careful? I do not know! Do these numbers make me 9 times more careful in Cape Town?! I am pretty sure it does not. What does it even mean? (I.e. do not expect behavioural outputs from me by giving me numbers as input!)

The point is that, as expounded elaborately in the book "Thinking, Fast and Slow", humans are not designed to appreciate statistics! This is a major reason why putting a lot of number in daily news helps no one. Rather it makes our mind numb and makes us more careless.

What can be done? Remember the statement by good old Stalin: "a single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistics"? Numbers rarely create emotions! What we need are more stories and fewer numbers. Even a single real story of real people will be more effective in hitting our empathy-spots and will help us relate to the realities. If we want qualitative output (of people becoming more careful and taking more precautions) then we need to give them qualitative input (of other people) and not quantitative. 

I would sincerely urge world-media to push more stories of Covid19 patients and their families: stories of both suffering and rejoice (on getting better), and try to limit the statistics. 

Modern psychology in Buddhism.

Currently, I am reading a very interesting book, Thinking Fast and Slow (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thinking,_Fast_and_Slow). The writer, a Noble laureate, explains numerous experiments he had conducted and discusses a two-agent model of the human brain.

One of these agents is called System I, the agent which reacts without thinking. This is the part that is responsible for all human biases. There is a range of fascinating examples in the book which shows how biased we all are all the time. Then we have System II which is the more thoughtful and calculating agent. However, our brain is lazy. Hence, it rarely engages System II.

This reminded me of the Buddhist model of the brain. Thee is our "monkey mind" which is always jumpy. It can never settle or seat in peace. (https://www.huffpost.com/entry/buddha-how-to-tame-your-m_b_945793) This is so similar to System I. And then we have the "noting mind" the part which can observe things without any bias. This is so similar to System II. https://www.insightmeditationcenter.org/transcribed-talks/noting/

Does Pooh love honey?

Pooh: I love honey. Don't you Piglet?

Piglet: But, Pooh, I brought honey for you last night. You did not eat it!

Pooh: Ah, I already have had two jars of honey by the time you came.

Does Pooh-bear really love honey? If he really loved it, he would have been able to eat it even after having two jars. I know, some of you may be thinking it is simple. It is the famous law of diminishing return. When you have more of something that does not give you as much fun/money any more!

Why does that happen?

Because we no more crave for it. Because we feel saturated. Because it does not feel as good anymore.

Ancient oriental philosophers took this argument to the next level. They suggested that we do not love or hate things or people or events. We love or hate the sensations created in our senses due to these things or people or events. When Pooh has had two jars of honey, the next jar is not going to create the same sensation as the first jar.

So does Pooh love honey? No! Pooh loves the "sensation" that honey creates. Replace honey with anything else that creates the same sensation, Pooh will love that as well. The same logic goes for hate as well.

My father discussed this with me a few weeks back. I felt numb thinking about it. It is as if, and correctly so, there is an opaque layer between me and the things/persons/events I am interacting with. I can not directly interact with objects/persons/events. They create sensations in my sense-organs and those sensations are the things I react to. (Note that in Oriental philosophy certain parts of the brain are also sense-organs as it senses different thoughts!)

When I say "I like xyz", it means nothing; and when I say "I hate xyz", it means nothing! How do we live in this opaque cocoon? Especially when we know that our feelings are impermanent (or anicca/anitya)? After one night, Pooh will get back his craving for honey.

This will need further musing. But as of now, there are two observations.

1. First of all, we do not love/hate the objects/persons we interact with. We love/hate the sensations these objects/persons create in our sense-organs.
2. Secondly, these sensations are fleeting and highly impermanent!

Fear of Missing Out: Abhinibesha

Most people think that the fear of missing out (FoMO) is a result of the new age digitization and social media. But if we go by the phrase itself, it can be defined in a much broader manner. It can also be linked to the indecisiveness we experience when presented with many equally alluring options in life. For example, imagine that as a new graduate you got a job in the nation's defence research wing and another job in a private company making microchips! This is a bifurcation where you have no idea which one is the better choice. Each one will soon bifurcate into very very different lives. Once in, you can not come back and go the other route. You have missed a complete life! That is really tough FoMO! Neither of these lives is worse or better. Both are equally enrichening. And that makes it worse. You know that both routes are equally beautiful BUT different. This is unlike the choice Neo (in the movie Matrix) had. What do you do? You feel scared and stunned. 

Let us take another point of view. Let us try to understand what is fear. Why are we afraid of anything? I think the musing may get easier if we take a really big fear, the fear of death. The fear of death is so symbolic in oriental philosophies and psychology that they have a separate name for it abhinibesha.  Why are we afraid of death? I think this is mostly because of the massive number of unknowns that come after death. No one knows. The life I am so used to ends. And I have no idea what comes next. Absolutely no idea. I do not want to lose my grip on the known. Two main things bother me. Will the things I love so much continue? Will the things I hate come later? Because in real life I am not happy exactly. I still have things/experiences I do not like; and I still have things/experiences I like too much to lose. Researchers have found exactly the same (i.e. unhappiness) as a major cause of social-media-based FoMO (https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0747563213000800).  But most of us are unhappy to different degrees. Hence, we all have FoMO. And the most apparent FoMO is the fear of death! By extrapolation, I hypothesize that those who take jumps in life should have less FoMO and less fear of death. It can be career/continent jumps or literal jumps (as done by adrenalin junkies). 

So how do I get rid of FoMO? Or at least not get bewildered by FoMO? (Of course, here FoMO means all kinds of FoMO starting from missing your friends's Facebook status to missing a whole new job to the fear of death.) I guess the simplest and easiest step might be to ride a roller-coaster! Experience, observe and immerse in the feeling of fear. Maybe force yourself to hop careers and countries. Who knows these experiences may teach us lessons that make us less fearful of changes and less fearful of the unknown and the missed messages!

PS: I am fully aware of the Yogic expounding of the fear of death and how it is linked to the false perception of individual personality and free-will. However, though I know it, I have not "felt" it yet. So for now I will rather keep jumping to deeply understand fear!

(Note on the image: This is the image of the phase space of a chaotic system. It shows how bifurcations lead to never repeating tracks. Once you take one path, your life is completely unique! )

Life is a goat!

There is an interesting story that my grandfather told me a long time back. There was a man with a few goats. He was once going to the big market in the nearby village to sell one of his goats. Three charlatans saw him and made a plan! One of them came to the man and told "Hi, brother. How are you? Where are you going with this dog?". The man rebuffed him telling "This is a goat you blind one!". After a few minutes, another of the three guys came to the man and told "Hi, brother. How are you? Where are you going with this dog?". This time the man was not so sure. He told "Don't bother me. This is a goat!" After some more time, the third guy came to the man and told  "Hi, brother. How are you? Where are you going with this dog?". The man was really pissed. He thought he made a mistake. Maybe this is actually a dog. Then he left his goat and went home! 

A few days back a very melancholic thought struck me. Most of the elderly people I know in the west personally never give up the pursuit of money! Even at the age of 80 and something they would not do a single thing without payment. That made me think, will I also become like this when I am old? Is this the side-effect of living in the west? In some ways, it was like the WTF-moment that prince Siddhartha experienced. Prince Siddhartha (who later became the Buddha) grew up in a household where his father took every care to make sure that Siddhartha does not come across any of the difficulties of life. One day young Siddhartha was travelling through the capital and he saw a sick person by the road. He asked his charioteer, "who is this person and why is he suffering so much"? His charioteer, Channa, told, "Prince, this guy is sick". Then the prince asked, "will I also become sick?" Channa told, "yes my lord". 

Looking at the elderly in the west made me think, shall I also become like this when I am old? When so many people tell that life is a dog then you tend to doubt your own convictions. You tend to think that everyone will be like this when she/he grows old; stuck in the rat race of money and name.

A few days later, I was talking to an ex-student of mine who is teaching English in China. He was telling me this interesting experience of him where he came across a beggar playing an instrument in a busy street of China. While he was comprehending the beauty of a frail old mand completely lost in his own music in the midst of the chaos and cacophony of a busy Chinese street, for a few seconds time stood still. I have felt such fleeting feelings at times as well. Suddenly, I realised that even though most people say so, life is not a dog. Life is a goat! 

Positive News During the Covid-19 Pandemic

One of the great quotes from Hollywood is "hope is a beautiful thing" (from Shawshank Redemption). In these times of #covid19pandemic we do need positive news to keep up our hope in the future and our hope in mankind. 

I have taken it upon myself to collect five positive news every few days and share with people I know. 

Due to my background, most of these will be related to #innovation and #engineering. You may follow me on Tweeter (@mister_mangu) for these updates. 

Else you can visit this blog where I maintain an archive of these pieces. #fightagainstcorona #positiveenergy #goodnews #covid19southafrica #covid19news 

05-May-2020

1. The science barometer has reported record-high confidence of people in science (in Germany). Would it mean that post-Covid19 society would be a more pragmatic and logical society with less scope for hate and more for truth and love? https://www.wissenschaft-im-dialog.de/projekte/wissenschaftsbarometer/wissenschaftsbarometer-corona-spezial/ 
2. In my last list of positive news, we read about EU's initiatives towards running united research to fight Corona. A global fundraising was started on the 4th of May. It has already met its $8 Billion target!  #UnitedAgainstCoronavirus https://researchprofessionalnews.com/rr-news-europe-innovation-2020-5-8bn-covid-19-r-d-target-met-with-1bn-from-horizon-2020/
3. The virus is mutating. But contrary to Hollywood mutation these virus mutations are making it weaker. It also makes a little bit of common sense. Mutations are mostly supported by the organism's chances of survival. A virus survives longer if the host lives. Hence, the death of a host is a bad grade for the virus! So as they get better at survival strategy they should get less lethal. Again, I am no virologist. I may be absolutely wrong. But mutations are happening and they are making the virus weaker. https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-8286181/Coronavirus-mutation-one-sample-signal-getting-weaker.html
4. Following the logic of double-negative, here is a piece of positive news based on the disproving of negative news! News around reinfections were false-positives! https://www.theguardian.com/world/video/2020/may/03/coronavirus-reinfections-were-false-positives-says-who-technical-lead-video
5. And some nice stats as always. The total number of recovered cases is now more than 1.1 million. Rate of increase of cases in Germany has been less than 1% and in the USA has been less than 3% for ten days. And Singapore is still one of the best warriors with less than 0.09% death rate. And yes, 80-90% of the cases in India are asymptomatic!

26-April-2020

1. Accepting freebies is a shame in traditional Indian culture. Some people still believe in it. Some migrant labourers in Rajasthan were quarantined in a local school. In return for the care and free-food, they painted the whole school building! https://thelogicalindian.com/latest-news/migrant-workers-paint-quarantine-school-sikar-20760 #dignity 
2. In spite of jaw-dropping numbers, the infection increase-rates are actually easing in the USA. The rate of increase in the numbers of new cases has consistently stayed below 5% for the past two weeks. 
3. Many might have missed the phenomenal news that the world's first portable MRI machine has got FDA approval during the Corona outbreak. Such instruments will be crucial in fighting pandemics. https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/fda-approves-worlds-first-portable-mri-scanner/
4. Innovators are working round the clock in enabling us to fight the pandemic. Here is an excellent list of such innovations. https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2020/04/coronavirus-covid19-pandemic-gadgets-innovation-technology/ #innovation While we are at it, let me also state that entrepreneurs are the happiest people working! https://www.forbes.com/sites/elainepofeldt/2014/03/05/survey-entrepreneurs-are-happier-than-employees/#544cdaea62d9
5. Disasters unite. Global disasters unite the globe! Major world organisations are inviting all countries and organisations to join hands in the fight against Covid_19. https://ec.europa.eu/commission/presscorner/detail/en/qanda_20_731  #UnitedAgainstCoronavirus

17-April-2020

1. Germany has been one of the most successful nations in terms of tackling Covid-19. In an important meeting, held on 15th April, the Chancellor discussed how the restrictions shall slowly be eased. They aim to open the schools on 4th of May. https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-52299358 
2. In spite of jaw-dropping numbers, the infection increase-rates are actually easing in the USA. The rate of increase in the numbers of new cases has consistently stayed below 7% since 11th April 2020. 
3. In spite of the growing number of new cases, the effective number of patients under treatment (i.e. infected - recovered) has stabilised in some of the worst-hit nations like Spain and Italy. It actually has been decreasing in Germany. 
4. A major aim behind any drastic measures like border-sealing or lockdown must be to buy time to get prepared. Finland closed borders to its worst-hit state of Uusimaa on 28th March. They have been preparing the medical facilities in other parts so long and shall mostly lift the blockade next week. https://yle.fi/uutiset/osasto/news/daily_govt_not_planning_to_extend_uusimaa_border_closure/11303010 
5. The government of Odisha (in India) took an out-of-the-box step in dealing with Covid19. They employed Mr. Subroto Bagchi (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subroto_Bagchi), the ex-director of a successful IT company (Mindtree: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mindtree) to manage the state's response. During the ongoing lockdown, Bagchi's team has been working in exemplary manner and now they have prepared 36 new hospitals in all major cities of the state to face the waves when the lockdown is finally lifted.    https://www.ndtv.com/india-news/odisha-to-have-36-dedicated-hospitals-for-covid-19-patients-soon-report-2212462

09-April-2020

1. Around 10,000 people recovered from Covid-19 just today (8-9 April 2020) in Spain and 13,000 in Germany.
2. Govt. of India has launched an aggressive funding scheme (of around US$ 7.5M) for startups planning to work on developing products to enable the fight against Covid-19. https://isba.in/cawach/ 
3. Round the world, countries, agencies and philanthropists are offering a massive amount of funding to entrepreneurs to help fight Covid-19. https://sciencebusiness.net/news/live-blog-rd-response-covid-19-pandemic 
4. Finland, the happiest country in the world, seems to have been doing what every other country must be doing, i.e. to have a reserve of medical accoutrement. Apparently, they touched their medical reserve for the first time since WW II. https://www.nytimes.com/2020/04/05/world/europe/coronavirus-finland-masks.html 
5. Companies around the world have been working on making easy to use inexpensive test-kits to facilitate large-scale testing. E.g. 
1. Brazil: https://tinyurl.com/w6zhy8c 
2. India: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-india-52064427 
3. Finland: https://tinyurl.com/rybcoro 
4. Germany (Siemens): https://tinyurl.com/u3lwcj9 
5. South Africa: In SA, they will use the existing TB test-equipments to speed up the testing. https://tinyurl.com/wqmbuar

 06-April-2020

1. “Rate” of growth of the infection has been consistently decreasing in the USA for the past 15 days. https://tinyurl.com/uxh3fja
2. India to double the number of ventilators by June using inhouse made ones. https://tinyurl.com/wkvj29d 
3. Odisha govt. (in India) sanctions $70,000 to feed stray animals during the lockdown. https://tinyurl.com/vmk68cr 
4. Doctor drives 540km to drop a patient home during the lockdown in India. https://tinyurl.com/wjfrkhs
5. A rising number of startups working to fight #covid19 https://tinyurl.com/tys9w8j 

Existential Nihilism to Buddhism!

Usually, I do not talk in terms of abstract concepts or any -isms. However, when there are pertinent terms describing what we have in mind, it may be a good idea to at least mention them as a homage to the great thinkers who thought similar thoughts. 

Last evening, while discussing the meaning of life, something became quite apparent to me. The question of "what is the meaning of life" has been bothering me for a while. It bothers one more when one is about to make some decisions (be it a simple one like whether to go for a movie or to the museum or a seemingly more complicated one like which career to choose). 

The search for the meaning of one's life is closely tied to the fundamental search of the "why" ("he who has a why to live for can bear almost any how"...Nietzsche).
The more we search for a meaning in life and the creation, the more we see the lack of one. What if life has no meaning? What if life has no purpose? What if there is no bigger divine plan?  The meaningless of life followed by personal definition of meaning is something that the great thinkers of existential nihilism (like Nietzsche, Sartre and Camus) tried to muse upon. 

Let us take the thought process one more step forward. What happens when we realise that everything is meaningless; every action is meaningless; every event is meaningless? Then in such an understanding where everything is meaningless, nothing is more or less meaningful. The very word "meaningless" implies that there are things which are meaningful. Without the existence of things which are (relatively) meaningful, the word "meaningless" will have no existence! Saving a dying person becomes as meaningful or meaningless as boiling your soup. Every action gets the potential of making us equally happy. 

Let us take one more step. The word meaningful or meaningless also has a strong sense of time embedded in it. I want to focus on meaningful things, things with a "lasting" impact. Meaning of an action or event is always measured by what impact it will create in the future. When everything and every event become of similar importance (or the lack thereof) then "time" won't bother us much. Anything we are doing at present is as meaningful (or meaningless) as anything that may come in the future. So we focus on the present engulfed by what we might be doing. When everything is the same (like every part of a fractal) what is the need of thinking of different parts? Rather, we can just give our undivided focus to the current.  That is one of the major philosophical teachings of oriental thoughts (be it Buddhism or Zen or Taoism or Vedantism).

However, it is one thing to follow a logical flow of thoughts and another to live it. It is one thing to understand it and another to "feel" it. 

A little bit fat!!

In the second half of 2010, I spent six months in Australia where I was hosted by a lovely family with four kids. The second oldest of them, Alice (name changed) was two years old. The family was kind enough to invite me to all their weekend family outings to expose me to the Australian culture. Usually, we would be travelling in one of their big vans with enough space for all of us. This one time, my hostess had an accident and was given a smaller car to drive for a week (by the insurance company). That weekend when we were going out it was me, Alice and her elder brother, James, in the back seat. Space was not enough and James was not happy. Alice tried to calm him down and told something very deep. She told, "what can Amit do, he is just a little bit fat"! Many times we are so quick to judge people and then complain. My father always says that we should try to see the "truth" about objects, persons and events. If we see the truth, we shall see the whole story and there shall be left no avenue to complain! (Please mark that we shall not have to try not to complain, it just would vanish!)

In spite of all this, I complain; sometimes a lot. At least I used to feel so. Today one of my ex-students (who is currently in Ireland)  told that he was talking to a South African origin lady (who has been working in Ireland for few years). Apparently, this lady mentioned that Cape Town is a stunningly beautiful place but the crime and load-shedding are ruining it. My student wanted to know if she was correct. He told, "you have never complained about Cape Town"! I asked, "have I ever complained about any place"? Then I suddenly realised that I do complain. But I complain about people. Never have I complained about places. I have lived in 8 cities so far and I have loved each one of them. 

I felt happy and satisfied with my progress! Out of the three things mentioned by my father (objects, persons and events) at least I have been non-judgemental towards one. Now is the time for me to try to see the truth behind the behaviour of persons as well. Why are they or their actions or their words making me inconvenient (when they do)? Once I "see" the truth I may just notice that (figuratively) they are just a little bit fat!

What do I deserve?

On the ninth year of my stay in Cape Town, I finally decided to stay over the new year. And, if you are in Cape Town over the new year, you must not miss the Cape minstrel carnival (also known as Klopse in the cape). This is a carnival with character. People make camps by the route of the parade since the previous night. Families gather with chairs, beds, cards, snacks, ice-boxes with drinks and babies! Nothing works on time (as if by design and desire) may be to let people have bit more of this fun and family time.

The first group marched around 3pm and there was a gap of 30 minutes after that. Bored of standing we meandered around and bumped into the Iziko Slave Lodge Museum (https://slavery.iziko.org.za/slavelodge). It was such a serendipitous step.  Suddenly so many things became crystal clear. I am sure coming from the carnival (with a rich slave-history) bolstered the surreal nature of the experience.

The first thing that I realised was why tears started flowing from my eyes when the dancing minstrel groups marched past me. I saw the following quote in the museum "joy in spite of everything". Such a powerful line. I knew that the marching people (mostly) come from the poorer sections of the region and face innumerable hurdles on a daily basis (starting from poverty and bad schools to close proximity to drug and gun crimes). Seeing them dancing in spite of everything.... was a very powerful emotion. Then Steve Biko's line gave me goosebumps.

While going through the history of slavery I bumped into the following story. There are catalysts in life which slap you off to deeply feel certain obvious things which you have been talking about but never really deeply realised. This was a lady who was given less importance than cutlery. And thousands of such have lived, experienced life and died building the nation of South Africa. Any hiking trail I walk on, any garden I stroll in, any building I touch, any monument I visit, nothing is untouched by these unsung heroes. And no; I won't feel pity for them as their contribution is monumental. I won't try to feel empathy as I know I can never. I can only #respect.  

This made me think about my own home country India (for that matter any country). Every civilisation, every country, every culture is built on the bones of unsung common people (mostly heavily exploited). I have done nothing in my life to deserve the sweet fruits of their toil. I have done nothing to be worthy of their sacrifices and lives. This realisation flooded me with an avalanche of humility.

I came out of the museum overwhelmed with respect and humility.  The realisation that I deserve none of these beautiful things was powerful. With the air of extreme gratefulness and the tears of joy, I enjoyed the rest of the carnival with character!

The forgotten legacy!

Legacies matter! I grew up in times when kids were beaten up as punishment. My mother was an exception. She had told me stories of the mighty Odias (people from my state of Odisha in India) and how they had conquered a huge kingdom once and how they used to trade with far-off lands like Java and Sumatra. And when I would make a mistake, she would just say, "is this the way you are going to maintain your heritage?" That was enough to bring me to tears! Heritage matters! I shall tell about the maritime legacies of my land of Odisha/Kalinga/Utkala.

In October 2019, I was in a conference and met a Sri-Lankan researcher. As usual, people ask me which part of India I am from. Most people would not know where Odisha is. This guy knew it! And he told me one of their legends. Apparently, Singhalease legends say that long time back a prince from Kalinga was ostracised. He left with hundreds of his followers and settled in Sri Lanka and that was the beginning of Singhalese civilisation. That is why they know about Kalinga or Odisha. This means that the maritime culture of Odisha existed since ancient historical times. (PS: Ashoka the great sent his son and daughter to Sri Lanka to spread Buddhism in around 200BC. This means Kalinga's maritime culture has been there before this).

Stories tell a lot about the culture. Characters in stories tell a lot about prominent personalities and trades from history. (E.g. The famous Sanskrit play Mritchakatikam tells the story of love between a trader and a rich prostitute. This shows that prostitutes in ancient India were respected and powerful personalities.) Stories from Odisha/Kalinga will mostly have a character named "sadhaba". Sadhabas are people who used to do maritime trade. They would be rich, powerful and would usually leave home for half the year in their ships. This is very unique to Odisha. Stories from no other state tell about such a class of people.

Lastly, I will tell about the festival of boats celebrated in Odisha on the full-moon day which marks the end of the Hindu month of Kartika (falls in November). This festival is called Bali-jatra (literally "voyage to Bali")! People would go to the nearby water bodies and float small boats made from banana-plant-parts. This festival is NOT celebrated in any other state in India. BUT, this is a big celebration in all the South Eastern nations, celebrated under different names! In Burma it is called Tazaungdaing (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tazaungdaing_festival), in Thailand it is called Loi Krathong (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loi_Krathong) and in Laos and Cambodia it is called Bon Om Touk (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bon_Om_Touk). These are the places the erstwhile Kalinga-Sadhabas used to sail to.

We Odias need to know our heritage and stories. Heritages matter! Legends matter! Stories matter.

Mao's mentoring!

(The following story is biographic. Only the names of the persons and the places have been changed.)

Dr. Atul Dash finished his medical studies in 1961. The economy of India was slow and not enough number of jobs were there (even for a fresh doctor). Dr. Dash kept applying for jobs. Applications, interviews, and rejections kept him busy. Before he had realized five years have passed since he graduated! One evening, having tea with his uncle Bamadeva, his uncle suggested why does not he open a clinic in Bamadeva's village? Bamadeva was a communist leader and was trying his best to improve the situation of his tribal village. (It can be noted here that those days a major tribal belt of India had significant Maoist-communist activities. Those were the days when the communist movement was fermenting in India. Soon, in 1967, things went really violent starting from the village Naxalbari. From this has come the current word of Nazalism.) With the support of Bamadeva and his friends, Dr. Dash opened his clinic. He would charge 2 rupees as consultation fees. That gave him just enough money to maintain a hand-to-mouth life. 

One day, a villager named Kashu visited Dr. Dash's clinic. Kashu had some problem in his leg. Dr. Dash diagnosed it as an incurable disease. However, Kashu had been advised by some people that getting a few injections will sort things out. He insisted on getting "some" injection. Dr. Dash had to inject pain-killers against his own judgment. Kashu would come once in a few days to get another injection. After eight shots, he was furious. He shouted at Dr. Dash, "what kind of doctor are you? You can not cure a simple pain even after eight injections. Did you do your studies using black money or stolen money?" This was the last straw on the camel's back. Dr. Dash lost it and slapped Kashu! 

Kashu lost no time and rang the village emergency bell! All the neighboring villages used to have such bells to organize a mass in case of an emergency. Soon a crowd of 400 villagers surrounded Dr. Dash's clinic. He was bound to a tree. The leaders (including Bamadeva) sat down to decide on the case. Dr. Dash was found guilty and was fined a sum of 800 rupees. Either he would pay the fine or be tied to the tree till he dies! Dr. Dash did not have that amount of money. He gave up and thought if this is the day he was to die, so be it. Bamadeva intervened and talked to the leaders and other friends of his. Amongst themselves, they collected a sum of 200 rupees and Dr. Dash took some loans and the fine was paid. 

This made Dr. Dash think. He thought people could "demand" cure because they have "paid" for it. He took a vow to never ever take a single rupee as consultation fee from anyone. He did find a job and became a successful cardiologist. Currently, at the age of 82-82, he keeps working as a doctor at a charitable dispensary. If anyone invites him to spend a few hours in some dispensary, his first condition would be the non-payment of any consultation fee by the patients. For, he was well mentored by Maoist movements!!

LISTENING

There is no love without understanding; there is no understanding without observing and there is no real observation without mindfulness. Let us quickly analyse this. Of course if I love someone I need to understand him. Without that there definitely shall be misunderstanding and the end of everything beautiful. And to understand anything or anyone I need to observe. Without observing I can not even  fix an IKEA table (and understanding a human is just out of question  if I am not observant)! The last link is the most interesting. If I want to observe something I have to make sure that I give my full attention and without doing ten other things in my mind simultaneously. In this age of multitasking this is a difficult task to do. But it needs to be done if I want to observe properly. 

And the major way we interact with another human is through talking. Hence, if I want to observe a person then I need to be completely mindful when he speaks. I have to listen with my full attention; not to accept or reject what is being said; not to just extract catch phrases from it and make my own impression of what is being said. Easier said than done. Even the venerable Ananda (one of the major disciples of Gautama the Buddha who was responsible for transcribing all of Buddha's talks) confesses this every time he starts archiving one of Buddha's addresses. He shall never write "Buddha told" so and so; rather he will write "I heard Buddha telling" so and so! The difference is subtle but very crucial. 

Please try to do it as an experiment. Try to listen to anyone/anything with full attention. Before you realise you shall start comparing, recording, or very quickly thinking something else. As a matter of fact our brain is not designed to listen/see the complete thing out there! Hypothalamus, a very crucial part of human mind, filters out the sensory signal/data and only sends contextual and some catch incidents to our brain to be processed! No wonder it is so difficult to listen anything "completely"! 

But it is not impossible. As we just discussed, it is biologically impossible given our current brain architecture. Which just means that we need to rewire our brain! As Sci-fi it may sound it is actually possible and brain-plasticity is one of the main research themes in the recent years. Of course it needs practice. And any practice needs motivation. What can be a better motivation than to love your loved one even more? This can be done by giving more and more attention to what he says. So that you don't just hear empty words; you see the intentions behind those words; you see the emotions behind those intentions; you see the preconditions behind those emotions; you see his life story behind those preconditions; you see the whole story. And when you see the whole story (not analyse; but directly feel it in an instant) there is complete listening. Then there can be no conflict; there is only love and joy.

LISBON DIARY

As odd as it may sound, I have never ever taken a real vacation in my life. I mean yes I visit places on conferences and collaborative visits. But then its always work related and while being away I keep almost full presence online and keep doing most of my official duties (as far as they can be done over internet). And when I am in India, visiting family and friends goes to almost to the level of chore. So when I decided on taking a vacation with Chris, I did not know what to do and how to do. We chose Lisbon because of the cheap flights I could get from Cape Town.

Saturday evening is when we landed in the capital city of the erstwhile mighty explorer nation of Portugal. They have been one of the most aggressive explorers from Europe and I have grown up with the epic stories of how Vasco de Gama discovered the sea route to India. This blog is about the series of bad experiences I had in Lisbon. I am not trying to open a complain book. Rather I am just trying to think may be these trends may point to the reason why the once-mighty seafaring colonial giant is currently an ailing economy.

Story 1: Where is my Uber?

After almost 25 hours of journey I did not have the energy to use public transport to get to our Airbnb. So I called for my Uber. Uber app told that “meet your driver at the Kiss-&-Bye point on 4th floor”! Lisbon airport has multiple mezzanine floors and its confusing what is what. We asked a lady in one of the shops. She told go straight and left and take the lift. We did that and ended up in a huge underground parking lot. Then I messaged my driver and he told he has no idea how we should get to him! Then we moved out, asked a security person and he sent us in another direction. Then a lady in a restaurant and she sent us in a completely opposite direction. And finally the driver told something sensible and we went out of the building and asked the guard there where can we find the parking place. He told go there…..pointing his finger to some vague direction. But finally we found our taxi. Its as if people enjoy telling things even if they do not know what they are telling. We shall see this story being repeated often. So much so that we made our own hypothesis!

Hypothesis 1: If a Portuguese tells you to go left then ignore her or
if at all you want to follow then go right!

Story 2: Where is my check in counter and boarding gate?

In a day I had to take a flight to Tallinn. Reaching the airport I realised that there are more than 4 clusters of check in counters and navigating between them needs some special skills. And again, I had to ask 3 persons; get lost a few times before I could find where to check-in. (That being said the security check and other processes were pretty streamlined). Once inside, one would need to wait till 15 minutes to the boarding time before they display the boarding gate. Its pretty counter-intuitive to me. I mean most of the flights do not originate from Lisbon and hence they would be knowing which gate will used for which flight. But for some mystic reason they won’t tell you the gate number till the very last minute!

Story 3: Where is the good food?

If you are a food connoisseur then be warned. We have tried in multiple places and the food is either terrible or you have dropped your expectations to such a level that even an absolutely plain food may taste OK. We were pretty brave in terms of experimenting with food and tried in a range of place starting from Pizza Hut ice-cream to a health food-place to Portuguese food in the tourist heartland to recommended brunch places to Asian food to Nepalese food to Pizza! Somehow people have lost the taste for good food or have just kind of accepted their destiny and manage with whatever crap is available.

Story 4: Where is my castle tour?

One fine day we wanted to do the most touristy thing and visit the castle. It was a decent 20 minute hike from ground level roads. The first trouble came when we stood in front of a trifurcation and there was no sign telling which way to go! Bifurcations and trifurcations kept surfacing up but never could we find any signage! I mean tourism department in India is pretty pathetic; yet they care enough to put some signs (especially something of this importance)!. And once we reach the top at the front gate of the castle there was a notice saying the castle is closed because of strike! How is this even possible? And even if it happened is not it just a kind gesture to put the notice below before people start hiking or taking taxi to come up?

Story 5: Where is my pizza hut?

After the castle saga, we took a really really long walk and by the end of it were too tired. In the search for something crap we thought of having pizza at pizza-hut. We checked it in Google-map and took an Uber. Reached in our street and there was no pizza-hut. Never ever has Goole-map failed me so far (not even in India or Thailand)! But I guess in Lisbon even Google learns a trick or two :) The pizza-hut was just not there! We tried to call and it linked to the pizza-hut office in Porto!

The Epilogue!

That being said, it’s not all bad of course. Lisbon is a fairly small city with pretty good public transport. The apartments have a nice vintage look to them; and the coffee is really nice. So if you have some great company then Lisbon is not a bad place to spend few days in!

OVERCAST LISBON

Overcast sky, chilly wind and cold drizzle;
With a wet jacket, cold is all you feel.
Small poddles of water on the road,
Light too dim to see only shadows,
With leaky canvas shoes,
Disgust and wet is all it feels!

But dim light feels so romantic,
And the cold jacket gives more the reasons to hold you tight.
Walking in rain with clasped hands,
Perspective is all it takes to change the sight!

Coming to the beautiful Lisbon,
And trapped indoor by the insistent rain;
Weary of the preceding long trip,
Hunger, anger and hopelessness is all you can retain.

Lying in the bed with you and
Looking at the smearing raindrops by the windows,
It feels so serene, and... time stops,
And life feels free from all shadows!

Perspective is all it takes,
To change shadow into inner brightness,
To make overcast Lisbon
A myriad colorful symphony of dripping droplets;
To make shoggy wet walks on potholed roads
Into delightful warm cosy memorable walks;
To turn the trapped indoor feeling
Into blissful exotic moments;
Perspective is all it takes.

Alter ego! (written in 2003)

It has just been another of those typical Saturday mornings in the Indian high tech cities, which we salaried people call weekend. So it looked as if the business clock of the city has started a few hours late.  The cuckoo, crow, and who knows what other varieties of birds were busy presenting their symphony. Not that they do it only on these great days called the weekends; but only on these days you become able to have some clear picture of their melodious chorus, due to the thin human interference. Dust free roads, sparkling sunlight, men-n-women in black and white on stroll,... these are some typical sceneries that you find on a weekend morning in Bangalore.

But for people like Salim the auto driver, Satya the vegetable vendor and of course our own Chinnamma, days and dates seem to have no special significance. Yeah, Chinnamma, the lady who comes everyday early morning to wash our utensils and clean our household; she must be around 35. Of course with the evergreen or ever yellow look on her face, if Sarita would say she is 30 or 40 or 43 or..., I have no proof to support my axiom on 

Chinnamma's age. Age is a luxury that only the non-poor can entertain with!!!

I and Sarita have never bothered ourselves with the exact details of Chinamma. And our language barrier, with Chinnamma's Hindi vocabulary amounting to two words and Sarita's Tamil proficiency limited to a few words, has stopped a gregarious housewife like Sarita from getting the family details of Chinnamma. All we knew was that she belonged to some distant village of Southern Tamilnadu and her husband was long dead in some odd road accident for which she is yet to get the 1 lakh rupees of compensation from the car owner who caused the accident. And of course she never failed to entertain her guests. Every week we would be having a few new faces in her one room roadside temporary home. But we have to admit that we have never seen Chinnammma in a gloomy mood in our last two years of stay.

And on that particular Saturday, my old friend Manu happened to pay us a visit in the early morning. As far as I remember I have never seen Manu rising before 9.30 in the day, when we were roommates in college. Of course time and marriage have the potential to change anything and everything!!! On enquiring, Manu told that he had come to take a few snaps of our Chinnamma. Photography has been the hobby of Manu since the days we were roommates. Of course presently for a long time, we had not been in touch, hence I had no chance to know if he had still persisted on his hubby. But like modern art, I have always failed to appreciate his snap-shots. Still I successfully hid my inability all those days. So continuing on my old habit, I again suppressed my surprise on why on earth should Chinnamma be photo graphed. Like ever, I appreciated (of course against my inner voice) his choice of subject and without delay asking Sarita for some snacks. I myself went to call Chinnamma. But my old friend stopped me and expressed his desire to frame Chinnamma along with her very own milieu. So we went outside to find Chinnamma busy in her eternal unending list of some odd job. This time she was cleaning the coconut leaves to gather the sticks for a broom. On hearing my voice, she just stood up and starred in a way as if asking like the Aladdin s jean "Just a call and I am ever ready to do any small chore for you, disregard to the time and place". But this time, I asked her using heavy sign-language to just sit down and do her job but give a glance towards us. With a lot of effort and another lot from Sarita we could finally convey our idea to her. Our good old friend, then, took his own time in adjusting his accoutrements and then another couple of minutes to take a few snaps. Busy as always he was, he left soon after finishing the job. But we could find Chinnamma working (who knows what) at the same place and for a quite a few hours so...!!!

And the very next day Chinnamma came to Sarita all blushing. We have never in these two years marked that pinkish Chinnamma!! May be some of her enlightened kids have told her about the magical instrument called camera ! So she told a lot of things to Sarita, from which she could clearly get that she wants to have a glance of her snaps. But I knew my friend very well and hence by another great amount of gesticulations, we conveyed to her that we will give her the photos after three months. And the next few days we saw Chinnamma glancing at the undecipherable thing called calendar on the wall. But soon she forgot the episode and was back to her old Chinnamma form.

Again it seemed, marriage and time have changed my friend. Because very soon, one day I got a mail with all those snaps of Chinnamma as attachment. Very religiously I got the best printouts of them as soon as possible. On coming to home the first thing that I deed was to show those snaps to Sarita. Though she was not impressed, but she appreciated Chinnammma's photogenic face !! And next we had to call Chinnamma. As ever, she was prompt enough to appear before us within a few minutes. And I handed over the snaps to her in a presidential demeanour, as if handing over some gallantry award to some army chief. Seeing the snaps, Chinnamma was dumb stuck. Her labour-stricken raged fingers touched her very own photographs. How strange, beautiful it would have looked to her eyes. We had doubts about when Chinnamma would have last looked at her own reflection on mirror. So obviously this reunion of Chinnamma with her alter-ego was a scene that neither me nor Sarita could ever forget. I positively doubt if Eliot or Keats would have been able to put those out-flowing expressions into words. Nor can there be any word for that emotion in any language of the world of mortals. And a matter of minutes, she was out of her trench of bliss and was smiling and blushing. Sarita conveyed that there was no other chore to be done. And she left for her home in a manner that can be compared to the way a Cat chases a mouse, swift though but silent enough.

Then for the next couple of days we could find Chinnamaa showing her snaps to every odd friend out there. It became her favourite hobby. May be for the first time in her life she got a HOBBY..!!! For people like Chinnamma words like hobby sound too expensive. But there was our very own Chinnamma, spending the few minutes of her hard earned time in her newly possessed pastime. Me and Sarita were observing her as our pastime, while our friend, the father of these pastimes, must still be enjoying passing his time in supplying a few more Chinnammas with their very own ALTER-EGOs...!!!